I am very old. Haha. Who would
have thought that I am still alive after 27 years? I guess, my purpose has not
been served yet.
Last year, I was jobless and I
and my sister celebrated my birthday by watching a movie and pigging out – literally,
just the two of us. It was simplest of all my but this year, I am very grateful
for I have a job, friends and even a male friend to celebrate this day.
So, here are some of the things that I’ve become after a year:
1. Career-wise – I have gone back to teaching and I must say, I
have somehow accepted this responsibility. Being a primary teacher has molded
me to be kinder and open to people. It has taught me more the virtue of patience,
happiness and sincerity.
2. Friendship quota – I returned to being an introvert. Despite the
Christian community and my colleagues, I only have a few friends. I still like
deep conversations and being updated about their lives though there are times
that I want to be alone and reboot. I am grateful for I am adjusting to my
workplace and that’s all because of my gay bestfriend; he made me more
comfortable around people and stick with me since we met.
3. Relationships – You know how I always suck with this aspect. So,
here’s a few:
a. It’s easier to let go and move
on. So far, I have dated five 4- 5 guys this year but all didn’t work out.
b. We love to stereotype.
Filipinos are stereotyped with close family ties. Americans are judged as
looking for friends with benefits. But times have changed -- no matter what
race he is, if he wants to cheat, he will cheat. If he wants to play, he will
play.
c. I stopped dating Filipino guys
and started hanging out with Americans. Their culture is really far from us but
once you get to know them, they are sweet and clingy. But just be careful, you
also don’t know what they are capable of.
4. God – I am nice but I can’t be Christ-like. You know that I am
struggling with my faith and with all the bad experiences I’ve been through it
made me AGAIN question the existence of God. To be firm in faith is the most
difficult thing to do especially if you are surrounded with temptations and loaded
work schedule. What’s shocking is that I even try to rationalize my deeds.
I hope next birthday, I’ll have a
boyfriend and I’ll be a better person.
