Why Friends Grow Apart

Hear ye! Yes, friends grow apart. But where does it all start? If we could trace its root cause, can we prevent this from happening?

Thanks to technology, we can defy the gravitational pull of distance; however we all need a friend whom we can talk with face-to-face, a friend whom we can exchange stories while eating pizza and fries and a friend we can invite overnight and sleep with comfortably. It’s different when she is just around. You bully one another to the point of exposing your deepest and darkest secret but at the end of the day, you know that you only have each other. She is there to wake you up when paralyzed from your over dosage of love stupidity. She is there to revive the logic when you are becoming too shallow and hopeless in your career.     She is there to explain when your family’s overacting about your unusual laziness and your frequent travel escapades.

But with distance, you cannot. You do not give away your stories to a friend who is miles away. She does not know every single thing because with distance, communication crumbles. If something important happens – good or bad-  you don’t feel like you need to tell her. Not so long ago, she would had been the first person you called. Time zones will eventually wear you off and before you know it, you are starting to drift apart.

Dynamic. We are all changing. As we age, we rank our priorities and unfortunately, friendship isn’t in our top list.  When you’re in mid or late 20’s , you are so focused in your post-college studies, building up your career and helping your family out. You don’t hang out much but when you do, it will only be for an hour. But how strange that some friends cannot sacrifice even an hour to meet us? How strange that friends cancel plans a day before the reunion? How strange are those friends who can afford to ignore our messages? How strange are those friends who call you only for help?

Well, it’s inevitable because that’s the way life is. We are all chameleons that adapt to this concrete jungle.

We have varied interests. You found out who you are and what you want, and then you realize that the friends you have known for so long don’t see things the way you do. You start to traverse along divergent paths. What’s next? You either make a new circle of friends or enjoy your own company. Yeah, eventually, you will move on completely.  And when your roads meet, it feels awkward and forced because they are now just somebody you used to know.

Sometimes, we grow apart because of no particular reason. It’s just you want to stay away from them. Stay does not exist in your vocabulary. Maybe it comes as we grow old and we become too tired to step out from our home. Books and movies are our newfound acquaintances and facebook is the sole way of getting updated with their lives. 

These are only some of the major causes of this heartbreaking phenomenon. We cannot stop this from happening. Friends grow apart. Deal with it.