Dear
Mister,
When are you coming?
If
you’re on your way, listen because I’m going to confess random things about me
which would probably freak you out and get you going back home. You deserve to know
the truth, at least.
First, I am mentally unbalanced.
I say one thing but mean the opposite. I do one thing but say the opposite. I’m
a living proof of ambiguity, uncertainty, insanity and somewhere in between. Being
insane is something that defines my character and I won’t hold back just
because everyone is acting normal. Insanity is a synonym of imagination, you
see. I would also do things that would aggravate the pain so I could punish myself
but feel elated simultaneously – ah, the beauty of pleasurable pain, I just
can’t get enough.
Second, I am fickle minded. I change my mind every
now and then including color of underwear. It’s just the way I am because my
principle is “Consistency is a crime;
inconsistency is freedom.”
Third, I am impulsive.
If I want to do something right now, I will do it. If I want to jump from the
cliff , I’ll do it. If I want to take a leave from work because of
laziness, I’ll do it. If I want to buy a backpack, I’ll buy it though it costs thousands. I am quite a shopaholic since I am pretty much unmindful of spending as long as it rids my stress and
prolongs my happiness. Talk about
savings, huh! Shaving my account it is!
Fourth,
I like to compare – past and present. He is more handsome, taller, smarter and all that -ish.
Fifth,
I am very independent. Is that even a bad thing? I mean, I don’t need someone tagging along and
protecting me. And besides, chivalry is
dead!
Sixth,
I have low attention span. There were times that I could not
finish what I started. Why? Go back to the first independent clause and my second
confession.
Seventh,
I am quite addicted to a form of sadness. And if that shit happens, give me
space.
Eight,
I am a romanticist. Could not blame a
bookworm, right?
Ninth, I still believe in love despite
all the setbacks. I chose to love someone who was not
capable of loving back. I l chose to
love someone who was impossible to love. And if I have done those without
expectations, how much more love could I give to you mister? The one I am waiting for 25 years?
I love deeply and
sincerely. If you decide to walk away, I
will run after you. I promise I won’t let go without giving a fight. I am not scared to take the chances and fall
again for you are my gravity. You
will always be worth the agony of waiting. You will look at me like I’m the
only woman in the room. You will speak truth into my ear and breathe confidence
into my soul.
You will be the man who
looks at the constellations with me and admire the mysteries of our destiny.
You will be the man reading me novels
and bedtime stories, a man who fondly
rereads all our exchange of letters on the rocking chair, a man who will respect
and honor me and my parents. You will be the man I will follow from the
rocky mountains to the strong rapids.
You will be the man wiping my sweat on my
forehead when we work out and explore the world. You will be the man waiting
for me at the end of the aisle in your black tuxedo while I, walking regally
and gracefully in my pale pink gown in the chapel by the beach is insanely
crying and smiling. You will be my one true love, my better half.
And I will cruise with
you...
And I will catch your
breath...
And I will watch you sleep...
And I will wait.. and
wait some more.
Tenth,
I lie.
And
if I can no longer wait, I wish both of us happiness.
And
if you can no longer come, I wish both of us joy.
Your future girlfriend, (?)
Kat
No comments:
Post a Comment